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Great Darktonian Pie War
Read all the chapters!

Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19

See other features!

Archived Inclusions
Story Structure
Spin-off Game
Discussion


This is the Prologue of the Great Darktonian Pie War.

And Io, a fungus shall sprout in the third millenium, one which shall cause more trouble in your courts than a dozen warriors...and his name shall be evil in foreign tongues. -Malcur

Prologue

In the beginning there were two deities whose names remain unknown, so we’ll just call them call them Steve and Dave. The two always argued, and due to some details that won’t be revealed until the 4th book in the series, Steve was deleted along with pretty much the whole planet they lived on. It was at that point Dave got this great idea. He was all like, “Let there be articles!” And lo there was a multiverse, and it was good. Skip to a few millenniums later in the CPFW Universe, and war is taking place. A war between the forces of good and evil, and all that other cliché stuff. The evil warlock Malcur was leading a rebellion against Finwe and his army. The reason for this was due to not being chosen as a master of the Elemental Amulets. This lead Malcur to create his own amulet, The Amulet of Shadow. This amulet possessed more power than all the other amulets put together, and many lives fell victim to its power. Eventually though, good triumphed over evil and Malcur was imprisoned in the Illuvat Void and yada yada yada. 

Now that the exposition is out of the way, let’s move forward to the present day. It seems normal enough, just a penguin in a propeller hat walking down the street looking unusually happy. He appears to be holding a letter of some sorts. 

“I can’t believe my luck today,” said the penguin. “I’ve been invited to the biggest party in Antarctica. Supposedly they’re gonna have models, cream soda, and models.”

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